In this article, I begin to discuss the seven points of the Integrity Starts Here! recovery program. The first two points are 1) Honesty, Self-knowledge, and Commitment; and 2) Purifying your Life. Here I provide a description for each of these points.
- Honesty, Self-knowledge and Commitment: This point focuses on being honest with yourself, others, and God about your addiction. There can be no denial in recovery. This includes taking responsibility for your addiction, the consequences of it, and for your recovery. Self-knowledge means acknowledging your weaknesses. This requires monitoring your emotions and behaviors, and identifying your triggers for acting out. It also means identifying your danger zones, the specific times, places, and situations where you are more likely to use pornography. This information is then used to develop strategies to avoid acting out. I call these battle plans. Above all, successful recovery requires a total commitment to the process. In addition to giving people the tools to achieve healthy sobriety, this gives people hope that they can recovery from this addiction
- Purifying Your Life: This starts with ridding your life of all pornography and anything else that might tempt you to act out sexually. For most men, it means monitoring all technology. Here is where use of accountability software, such as Covenant Eyes is needed. It also means setting clear boundaries with people, places, things, technology and situations that could lead one back into pornography. Purification also applies to your heart and mind. You will need to change the way you feel about pornography, realizing that it’s simply about using and exploiting women. You will learn how the women in pornography are truly victims, and that by viewing it you are contributing to their victimization. The goal is to ultimately be repulsed by pornography, both intellectually and emotionally.
In the next article, I will discuss the next two points of the Integrity Starts Here recovery program 3) Support and Accountability; and 4) Counseling.